RBG & Equal Partners
I join millions of Americans in mourning the death of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg this week, who has arguably done more for gender equality in the United States than any other human.
I own a copy of Carmon and Knizhnik’s Notorious RBG, and remembered a chapter dedicated to Ruth’s relationship with (as she would say) her partner in life - Marty Ginsburg. This weekend I reread that chapter, and was amazed at how perfectly some of her quotes aligned with my research.
“What is very hard for most women is what happens when children are born. Will men become equal partners, sharing the joys as well as the burdens of bringing up the next generation? But that is my dream for the world, for every child to have two loving parents who share in raising the child.”
She often acknowledged the importance of equality at home, and the link between the household space and the professional space. “Fortunately, in my marriage, I didn’t get second-class treatment.”
I also appreciated Marty Ginsberg’s words about supporting his partner’s career; he appeared to experience genuine joy in helping his partner succeed.
“I think that the most important thing I have ever done is enable Ruth to do what she has done.”
Call for interviews!
I am interested in speaking to a few women who fully expected equality in their household when she first married – but then somehow, for one reason or another, it did not work out that way. If you or someone you know “accidentally” became responsible for the home’s domestic burden, I’d appreciate a short interview. All interviews for Equal Partners are 100% anonymous. Just send me an email at email@example.com. Thank you!
I’ve recently finished two books. Thought you might enjoy them, too.
1. Boys and Sex by Peggy Ornstein. Like her previous publication Girls and Sex, this book was hard to read. I found the chapter on porn especially difficult. But Ornstein tells us that the simple act of talking about difficult topics (sex, pornography, expectations, consent, respect and contraception to name a few) can greatly reduce our kids’ chances of being involved in sexual assault. For these reasons, I think this is a must-read for every parent.
2. Entitled by Kate Manne. The entire book is interesting, but Chapter 7: On the Entitlement of Domestic Labor was especially relevant to Equal Partners. I keep returning to Manne’s description of “himpathy,” and how women frequently make excuses for their male partners’ domestic shortcomings; enabling entitlement further. I admit, I struggle with this myself.
See you in October! Hope everyone stays safe and healthy. As always, feel free to share with your friends who might be interested.